First Love

I should have never said that I like you. Everything ended between you and me in that terrible timing. I was not being honest to myself. I was not prepared. The fear of facing my genuine emotion toward your appearance was bigger than seeing myself lying to someone who just doesn’t want to be lonely. It’s gone bad. Then I put myself into the position that you can easily use me whenever I’m around you. You knew I liked you. I just didn’t want to see you in someone else’s arms. It was worse than hell. When I left you, I had a hard time for 3 years trying to forget you. I hate you. Now, it is all behind us. Time passed us. I sometimes miss you. The countless number of men who have been reflected in your wet and transparent eyes would be laughing at me. Will I be able to meet you again before I die? If I truly long for you, will I meet you again someday like one of those movie scenes? I hope you love me in next life.

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