Don’t you talk about my wife like that. You better stop lying to me. She loves me so much and we believe each other more than anyone. It’s not true. It can’t be real. Take this away from me. No I don’t believe it. That’s not my wife. Don’t try to trick me with this small picture. You just leave. Go away from me. I’m going back to my home next month. We promised. She is waiting for me. We have been part for a while but she won’t ever do this to me. Go. Just leave me alone.
When will he come back to me? It’s getting harder to wait for him day by day. The day he left for his work seems like a yesterday. I have imagined the day of meeting him everyday when he comes back. I want to hold him close and tell him I love him that I’ve been living lonely night and thinking of him. But he never comes back. There is a guy who has been always here for me when I’m lonely. He has been more meanigful than a friend recently. I might have been too close to him. He might come to my home tonight.
In my chaotic and painful memories, only you are beautiful. Like the sailors are committed to find the dim light of lighthouse in a stormy dark sea, I’m only looking for you for me. If I don’t find you, I will be lost in the rain. I want to give you what you want. I need to give you what you need. If you don’t believe in me, I will decay in a large desert and nobody will be able to find me. I change myself because of you.
You are listening to my dream. You are listening to my story. You are telling me everything. You are telling me your story. It’s a magical feeling that animates me. You give me a belief that I can believe in you. It doesn’t matter what you say is a truth or not. I don’t want to find the truth anymore when I’m with you. I just want to be happy with you. That is all I need. You complete my dream with your story.
He slowly opens the side door of church. Quite a lot of people are looking at the groom, bride, and officiator. Nobody finds him coming inside of the church. He sits on edge of the church pew in the corner. His eyes are fixed on smiling bride. He keeps staring at her. She looks so happy in a wedding dress. He recalls the memory with her. Nothing really happened. It could have happened. It’s just that he doesn’t want to think of them. But only the regrets remain filtered on his mind. He thinks that it’s his fault that he is not the one who is standing next to her. He decides to celebrate her wedding today. He pretends that everything is good. He smiles a little. He feels sore on his eyes and his vision getting blurry. He shed tears in pain. He starts weeping with his eyes still fixed on her.
Liking someone feels strange. My mind decides at once whether I like you or not. It makes me happy to think of you. But it makes me lonely to think of you as well. From the time I open my eyes in the morning, I start missing you. What if you hate me someday? What if you vanish away from me someday? Then my mind find peace when you call me or text me. I want to see you. Don’t leave me waiting. I want to be a part of your life. I’m going blind by your sweetness.
When you scold me, I just listen to you. But when you nag me too much for nothing, I talk back to you. Then you lower your voice as if you did not say that and you did not mean to say that. It’s like you are saying okay, okay I will soothe you, I still like you. You just like messing with me. You make me feel that you are pecking at me because you care me. I don’t know why I like you. You remember what I like and what I say. I wonder why you react and care so much to every small things I say. Would it be just from responsibility? I hope I was more than that. I want to be a person who remains in your memory.
You are professional. In the past, you might have gone through disappointing results for not being very helpful to people. It would have been sad and painful. I can’t imagine how many people you had to deal with the matter. I feel like I can feel your fatigue from your wrinkled eyes. But I’m surprised to notice your passion to listen to my story. You are just giving your best at this time. Your attitude and passion make me want to change myself. Your simper which is still natural feels cordially. I’m learning more than I came here for.
You said you are not a girl who can love only one person. When I felt it was the last night that I can be with you, I wanted to drown myself in your eyes. Just close your eyes so I can kill you. I hope you don’t stop looking for someone you love. After I return to my life from you after that night, I cannot meet you anymore. But I want to spend the night with you again. Only the sadness left in me for meeting you accidentally. It seems you are coming close to me so I cannot stand it. If I could spend one more night with you, I want to give you all my love.
My love won’t ever go away from me until I die. I believe waiting is the consideration. It’s what I can do the best for you. I understand you want to stay away from me and need more time to think when I express how I feel about you. I will trust you telling me that you will talk to me later. However I have to wait for you to come back, I can endure every moment of the time. This waiting is another time for me to make my love and trust grow bigger for you. You just need more time to look into my love. I believe in our love. I love you too much. I will never give up. I will never say goodbye.