I believed if time pass, I will forget her. If I run away from her, I believed other people will fill my heart. I still remember her even now. She was quiet and introvert person. The regrets that I have for my weakness are killing me. I can’t forgive myself that ran away from the person that made my heart beat fast. I was bold enough to praise her beautiful face and I was proud of myself that I smoothly approach to her although I was drunk. It was the first time I was so drunk. The smirk I saw from people for my action when I praised her haircut gave me weird satisfaction. Her shy smile made me look inside of me who still don’t know what love is. I sometimes think of her in the day like I’m drunk. I wish I could see her shy smile again.
The pastor told me to try praying. So I did it.
“Please listen to my wish. Please tell me my wish will come true. Please tell me how to do it.”
“Just do it yourself.”
“Why? Why don’t you tell me?”
“You won’t do it anyway.”
“You are right. I’m too tired. I smoke too much. I don’t even have a passion in anything.”
“Why don’t you say anything? Please tell me. What should I do?”
Then I fall asleep.
I’m tired of going to church.
My dream failed but it is accomplished as I die.
I have no right and courage to cry.
We all look different but we are all friends.
It has been hard to meet each other,
But we are all friends after all.
What you want is what I want.
I swear to our hands held together.
Your eyes telling me to cheer up,
Your smile encouraging me to live,
Remember our beautiful memories.
We all walk on with our dreams.
I stand on the street at night,
Holding slowly burning cigarette.
After all the tough time passed,
Only the sadness left on my eyes.
I wish the moon my wishes
In the chilly darkness of small island,
Hoping my wishes reach the moon.
Hoping the wind don’t scatter them away
Looking at the moon surrounded by cloud
Until it illuminates my future.